Life Story
David was the youngest in the family. He was an observer, he watched other kids get in trouble and he learned not to make the same mistakes.
He watched his mom when she suffered with migraines and his dad gently tend to her. He watched his dad struggled to keep food on the table and the bills paid.
He watched as his father let go of his dreams to own a farm and have his own herd of cows. David observed closely how his parents worked together and had a true love that allowed much of the hurt and hard times to fade away.
Because he was an observer, he knew what he wanted from the age of eleven. David wanted one woman to love and make her his wife. He wanted a family from his wife. He didn't want to hang out with the guys, or run around with other women. He wanted to make a family. Again, this is age ten and eleven, and he wasn't going to budge from that plan.
All he had to do is hurry up and grow up and find that perfect wife!
Unfortunately, it wasn't as easy as he anticipated.
While he was in high-school he fell in love with a girl he thought was "the one". They dated several years as he was going to college for engineering.
One evening as he made a surprise visit, he discovered she wasn't "the one" as she was sharing her blessings with other guys. She told David that she wished she could keep him on a shelf until she was ready to settle down.
Over the course of several years, Dave dated a few other girls. David didn't like dating, he wanted to be married. He couldn't find a girl with the right combination of devotion, love, dreams, and family like he could so clearly see play out in his mind, over and over.
At first David worked as a mechanical draftsman, but being unhappy with being stuck in the lower position, he showed his ability to command situations by stepping out of his realm to help others solve production problems. He was promoted to manager before long.
Many of the long time employees were disgruntled at his promotional climbs, he would play dumb and ask for their input and advice. Before long he befriended everyone, even his most aggressive coworker.
Because he was an observer, he absorbed and took note of people, attitudes, and what promotes success.
As he moved through two other companies in management, he was still working harder than ever to find the missing piece of the puzzle in his life.
His father had died of cancer making Dave promise him that he would take care of his mother for him when he was gone. This was not a task that Dave took lightly even though it seriously impaired his opportunities to find that perfect woman. He would often overhear comments from others talking that he was tied to his mother's apron strings. He didn't argue or dispute. He knew the promise he made to his father, it didn't matter what others thought.
Every love story that Dave fell into had a crushing end. His father found the one true love for him. His brother, Ronald, found the one true love that fit him to perfection. His brother was happy, he had a perfect family, someone to share his life with. Why couldn't Dave find someone to fit him.
It hurt to see couples on the street kissing or holding hands. It was all around him, everywhere he looked everybody had somebody, but not him. Everyone started telling him he was too particular and fussy. They told him to lower the bar and he'd find somebody to satisfy his desires and dreams.
Going against his own caution, he started dating a woman everyone said would be a perfect fit for him. At first he enjoyed the carefree adventure. He didn't let all the red flags bother him. He had to daily convince himself to have fun. Four months later he had enough. The red flags were too much. Dave shut off. He didn't tell anyone anything, he just simply stopped and shut himself in.
He determined that, at his age, he was not ever going to get married and he had to stop trying. It was too painful.
He could excel at his workplace, so well, that he decided to open his own business. He was going to pursue his business and not think about his dream of marriage and family.
Realizing that his father had to set dreams free so he could obtain peace of mind, now Dave needed to do the same.
When Dave was twenty years old he had helped a very good friend that he worked with through a difficult divorce. He had helped her move, stop smoking, find a home, cars, he was a fantastic support for her and her eight year old daughter.
Through the years, this friend and her daughter was as close as family to him. He was there for them at every heartbeat. He was there for the friend as she found love with a wonderful man, Dave was in their wedding. He was there for the daughter as she got married (he was in her wedding) and as she completed her nursing degree, and had children, and bought a home. Dave once said she was the best thing that ever happened to him.
Now at forty three years old he recognized when another friend was struggling through a difficult divorce. Dave was there as support and guidance when Vicki needed direction with her life choices.
Vicki had many insecurities, but Dave who knows how to strengthen buckling knees, took her under his wing as a type of project, knowing he was helping someone less fortunate.
Vicki, with four young children and being soon homeless, Dave's protective nature started kicking in.
Before too long Dave and Vicki started realizing they both shared the same hopes and dreams. Dave started coming alive again. He had shut down never expecting to find "the one" who fits his life.
Dave also liked the fact that he was eight years older than Vicki, just as his father, Victor, was eight years older than his mother, Anna. Dave and Vicki got married on the same day as Dave's parent's anniversary in 2003.
Dave was concerned about his mother, he needed to continue caring for her. Vicki, again, was on the same page. Family first, young or old.
Dave's character was such that he was completely satisfied with his full family. He even advised Vicki that it may not be wise to risk her health to have another baby since she was forty years old.
Vicki knew Dave was a proud father of four children, but she also knew that she, herself, was missing the young toddler children to keep her occupied. The kids were getting old enough that they didn't need mommy as much. When she asked Dave to please give her just one more baby, he was thrilled. But he also knew that it could come with challenges.
When their fifth child was born, Dave was a very hands on father, just like his own father. Dave had the little girl in his arms whenever he was home, even when sleeping. He took her everywhere to show off his pride and joy. At Lowes, the cashier commented to Dave how wonderful it was to be a grandfather. Dave hoisted the baby higher on his shoulder and said he wouldn't know, this bundle was his daughter! (The cashier was visibly regretting her remarks).
Dave was in the height of his happiness. He had everything he longed for. The baby was almost two years old, and all his children brought him such a glow of love and happiness. Life couldn't get any better!
Then Vicki told him they were going to have another baby. Dave felt his life was turning into a frothy bliss! That is, until their pregnancy only made it halfway through when the baby was in danger of termination at twenty one weeks. Dave had a business to run, but he would not leave Vicki's side at the hospital. He wouldn't eat or drink. Dave sat silent for nearly twenty four hours listening and absorbing every word the doctors, nurses, technicians, and anyone else was saying.
At twenty three weeks Dave's youngest was brought into the world. This was possible because of the valuable information that came from his friend's beloved daughter. Her good friend gave birth naturally to her under developed premature baby and she believed the baby didnt make it because of the natural birth.
With that information, Dave asked Vicki to allow the doctors to take the baby by c-section so the baby has a better chance to survive. Again, Vicki was on the same page.
The baby did survive but it was only the beginning of the year long trial of, traveling over an hour one way, daily, to support the baby at the hospital.
While all this was going on, Dave would strive to keep all the children in the family close so they could feel his determined strength for them. He needed to help them know that family is strength, and he had to help them feel secure.
That was the utmost importance to Dave. Providing security even in the worst situations, like his dad provided for him.
Dave gave of himself until he literally couldn't give any more. Dave had a stroke in January 2020. It took him a month before they released him from the hospital. Dave made a comeback, but the second mini-stroke a year later stopped his forward progression.
Dave wanting to help as much at his business as possible, he continued to teach Vicki and the family the rules of business, the secrets to look for, the stick-to-it-ness that's needed to succeed. With Vicki tending to Dave's every need as he slowly declined, Dave cared for his family and for his love, Vicki.
Dave felt blessed. Dave left a legacy in his name, all six of his children, his business, his home. Dave had a hard road getting to his dreams and when he did find true love, the wife, the family, the life he wanted and dreamed of, his life was shortened too quickly. But Dave's story is only just beginning...